Mens 1 vs Colchester

I walked into the changing room to discover Coach Reece very pleased with himself. Hours poring over internet video footage the previous night had resulted in whole reels of A3 printouts to demonstrate to us our positional ineptitude and how to improve penetration skills. A bit concerned, I took a half glance at the pictures, concluded that indeed we were playing hockey in them, asked a couple of insightful questions like "is that the edge of the pitch?", and generally nodded in agreement at the instruction of "tuck in". At the second mention of "tuck in" I put my shirt inside my shorts and now was quite confident I had mastered the instruction. 

Much enjoyment was had during the warmup as a leaf blower was produced to deal with the fallen foliage on the pitch, plenty of discussion about prevailing winds, where to start and where to end ensued as Reece eagerly scampered off. 

In Colchester we faced a team who were bottom of the league, but their goal difference wasn't particularly awful so we were unsure whether they'd been unlucky this season or were struggling. We were instructed to be 3-0 up at half time and with a squad stacked with enough attacking potential to defeat the entire cast of Street Fighter 2 we were bullish to say the least.

We started brightly, attacking straight down the middle and it wasn't long before we earned our first short corner. Dom Graham steps up and unleashes a drag flick with the speed of one of Guile's sonic booms into the bottom right.

Harps 1 - 0 Colchester

We're on top, Nick Chouksey reaching everything in the middle akin to Dhalsim's extending limbs. It wasn't long before we earned another shorty, and you guessed it: time to unleash the sonic boom.

Harps 2 - 0 Colchester

"Danny get higher and in", "Rees tuck in" came the calls from the sideline. Clearly something was going wrong, us being two-nil up and all. So we figured something needed to improve. Danny indeed did get higher and in, and picked up our third goal of the day at a short corner. Was it option number 3? 

Harps 3 - 0 Colchester

Would we achieve our objective and be three-nil up at half time? Nope, Todd only went and ruined by clinching our fourth goal - finding the bottom corner with the accuracy of one of Ryu's fast fireballs - "Hadoken"! Captain Nick Kimberley finally decides to show up 35 minutes late.

Half time: Harps 4 - 0 Colchester

It's always hard to keep the same intensity and not back off after a successful first half. Andy King in goal was rarely called upon, if at all, and as he'd twisted his ankle before the game probably a good thing too! Our distribution had been pretty good via Durbidge and Bunbury round the back, it was then enhanced in an experimental positional change as Dom was dropped deeper from the midfield to partner Nick K. James Singer decided to get in on the pinging the ball action, elects to pass the ball to no one, choosing a 20yard space on the pitch occupied by nothing more than a few leaves that the leaf blower had missed.

Mark was doing his best not to get on the scoresheet. A putter would have done the trick off a rebound but he fished in his bag and discovered the lob wedge, ballooning the ball over the bar. Dom thought sending a sonic-boom over the bar was an elegant way to avoid a hat-trick. Mark then again has the ball in the D, Russell Timms is in prime position on the back post waiting for a tap in, yet Mark thinks as opposed to gifting his teammate a sitter he shoots himself and finds the backboard.

Full time: Harps 5 - 0 Colchester.

We were targeting a big November, and with four wins from four it couldn't have gone much better, leaving this team of street fighters sitting a very respectable fourth in the division.

MoM To be honest everyone played pretty well. Skills had a great game, and also turned up to the pub.

DoD Mark. Look at the team photo - left knee should be raised.

Report by Reesy